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Force of Execution (2013)
Director: Keoni Waxman
Writers: Richard Beattie, Michael Black
Cast: Danny Trejo, Steven Seagal, Ving Rhames
MPAA Rating: R
Synopsis: A gangster with a goatee battles a rival with a penchant for cigars. Oh, and some guy with deformed hands befriends Danny Trejo in an alley. That's about it.
Thoughts: It's hard to believe Force of Execution is a legitimate movie. The scenes are strung together in such a haphazard fashion that you'd almost think someone took two completely different films and attempted to blend them together Godfrey Ho-style. Seagal, sporting an odd goatee and a spray tan, mumbles his way through the narrative in a manner that suggests he blew out his vocal chords screaming the blues. The only real star here is Bren Foster, who really deserves his own flick. The guy is an incredible martial artist and a decent actor, so it's kind of sad that his talents are wasted on this fetid garbage. Sadly, this ranks as one of the absolute worst endeavors Seagal has attached his name to in quite some time. If Maximum Conviction was one step in the right direction, then Force of Execution is easily five steps back. This one is strictly for the hardest of the hardcore. Even then you should question what you're doing with your life.
Recipe for Disaster: Steven Seagal's Infernal Mumbling + An Overall Lack of Coherence + Bren Foster Deserves Much Better Than This.
Bunshinsaba 2 (2013)
Director: Ahn Byung-Ki
Writer: N/A
Cast: Park Han-Byul, Zhi-Lei Xin, Hao-Ran Zhang
Country: China (Mainland)
Synopsis: When a group of friends discover that the new addition to their clique is cursed, something very bad happens. Before long, they start dropping like flies.
Thoughts: Since I'm a moron and didn't do any research beforehand, I thought director Ahn Byung-Ki's Bunshinsaba 2 was a sequel to the 2004 horror flick Bunshinsaba. As it turns out, this is a follow-up to Ahn's 2012 endeavor Bunshinsaba. Thanks for confusing the hell out of me, China! Regardless of my ignorance, I rather enjoyed this predictable little outing. Although it unfolds as one might imagine, the filmmaker's ability to generate a moderate amount of suspense kept me engaged for the duration. Ahn Byung-Ki brings the South Korean style to mainland China, delivering a flick that feels like most thrillers from his native country. Unfortunately for those hoping to get creeped out, the scares are sadly few and far between. Still, Bunshinsaba 2 is sure to please less discerning fans of Chinese cinema. Just don't go in expecting a direct sequel to any of the previous Bunshinsaba movies. They're not connected in any way. Damn it.
Recipe For Mediocrity: One Tired and Easy-to-Follow Plot + Not Enough Genuine Scares + It's Not a Sequel to Either Bunshinsaba (2004) or Bunshinsaba (2012)
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The Conspiracy (2012)
Director: Christopher MacBride
Writer: Christopher MacBride
Cast: Aaron Poole, James Gilbert, Ian Anderson
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
Synopsis: Two filmmakers interview a conspiracy nut with a megaphone. Although they don't buy his crap at first, they soon discover that he might be on to something.
Thoughts: Although I'm sick to death of faux documentaries, I can't seem to stop watching them. I keep hoping that one will impress the hell out of me, thereby justifying the time I spend wallowing in the genre. Writer/director Christopher MacBride's The Conspiracy works great if you don't spend a lot of time thinking about it. Those looking for a deep and meaningful exploration of the conspiracy theories will be sorely disappointed. Instead, MacBride uses the setup to tell a predictable yarn about two dudes who decide to infiltrate a secret organization. The ending is thought-provoking, though I doubt you'll spend a lot of time pondering the flick once it's over. The Conspiracy is an interesting albeit deeply flawed cinematic experiment. Had MacBride and company developed a more believable scenario, this could have been a fantastic experience. Watch it when you're tired, stoned, or in a state where you're not prone to pick apart plots.
Recipe For Mediocrity: Weak Conspiracy Theory-Inspired Storyline + Some Wonky Pacing + I Swear the Government Didn't Make Me Write This Review
Starship (1984)
Director: Roger Christian
Writers: Roger Christian, Matthew Jacobs
Cast: Adam Cockburn, Tyler Coppin, Ralph Cotterill
Release Date: April 4, 1987 (USA)
Synopsis: Working conditions on a distant planet are pretty rough. When a group of rebels decides to fight back, all hell breaks loose. Plus: Football helmets!
Why You Should Watch: This movie made me the laughing stock of a sleepover back in the late 80s. While all of my friends rented stuff like Predator and Lethal Weapon, I grabbed a dusty copy of Starship. I still love this movie, flaws and all. You may know it by the alternate title Lorca and the Outlaws. Cheesy bliss all the way around.
Rough Play (2013)
Director: Shin Yeon-Sik
Writer: Kim Ki-Duk
Cast: Lee Joon, Seo Yeong-hee, Yang Dong-geun
Release Date: October 24 (South Korea)
Synopsis: Being a hot young actor is hard work. Sometimes it can get rough, especially when gangsters are involved. This is that kind of South Korean drama.
First Impression: I typically don't go for this sort of South Korean flick, but Rough Play looks amusing. Movies about hotshots who find themselves in deep trouble are always entertaining, even when they're bad. Who knows? Maybe this one will surprise me. Netflix, take note. South Korean drama nerds will probably love it.
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